Sunday, February 25, 2007

Movin' On...

You'd think after making so many moves- I'd be used to it, but I'm simply not. I hate that feeling of living out of boxes and being in between here & there. We're making progress with packing, but painfully slow. SO much to do. It's overwhelming and we are worn and somewhat short-tempered. I look forward to having this over with soon. Thought we were settled when we built our first house, but it was not meant to be. I do NOT like living this nomadic existence of moving every 1-2 years. The kids need some roots.

While working together on one part of our packing, Jay & I were not speaking- both lost in our own silent thoughts. He said, "You know, I did everything I could to make it possible for us to stay here." I disagree, but tried to be kind and said, "I know you did, Baby, it just wasn't meant to be and we have to accept that."
God has blessed us with beautiful children and a talent for music. Perhaps He allows all of our other struggles to keep us from getting full of ourselves? I don't know, but it's hard to believe that anyone's string of bad luck can last this long...

It was a full performance weekend with 'Message of Mercy'. It tears me up to be leaving. They are contemplating having me stay involved with the group- I'll just fly in for performances every once in a while and of course, I will still be writing music & arrangements for them. I would be considered an 'alternate member'.

God writes a lot of chapters into our life stories that we, ourselves would not have chosen. Here I am again with my life in boxes, hanging in limbo- not sure what the next step is beyond this move. However, I choose to learn what I can from each passage in my life and use it for good. Someday, I hope I'll be settled somewhere permanently though. I don't want to own another house until I'm sure it's where we'd like to be and where we're able to stay for at least a decade. Selling a house is too much of a hassle. I'm almost afraid to make friends anymore because it's been SO hard to say goodbye.

Used to be people lived their entire lives in one small town. As much as I enjoy living all over the place and getting to know the people & different parts of the country, there's a part of me that just wants to stay put for a while...

7 comments:

David said...

Sorry to see you leave.

Lily said...

"I choose to learn what I can from each passage in my life and use it for good."

Bless you during this time of transition. I will pray that your move goes well.

I'm glad you will continue to be able to have some involvement with MoM. God uses you to bless people through music, so I know He will continue to provide opportunity for that in your life.

imfreenow.blogspot.com said...

So you got a load of selling a house, eh? I pray this goes well for you as well.

Trailady said...

Hi David, Hope all is well for you. Yes, this has been a tough transition, but I'm excited to see what God has in store for us in MI. Fortunately, I can still keep in touch with everyone via my blogs. :o)

Lily, thanks for the well-wishes. Getting the truck loaded in our biggest task at this point since nobody showed up today to help load. I have a bulging disc in my lower back, so I'm not supposed to lift over 50lbs. Not sure how much good I will be, but I will try...

Hi Gabrielle, How's your recovery going? Yep, I don't plan to go through the purchase or sale of a house many more times. Yikes!!

Andy said...

Perhaps He allows all of our other struggles to keep us from getting full of ourselves?

Good insight TL - He's allowing your struggles right now to draw you closer to Him and you are being refined through this process. No doubt I believe you will be so much stronger spiritually when this period of struggling ends.

Stay strong!

sage said...

I have moved many times--back and forth across the country--and have enjoyed and looked forward to each new movie (although leaving the desert for Michigan was hard). Now I find myself wondering what I missed by not being rooted--I read Wendell Berry's work and feel guilty. May the move go well--will you still be doing church music work in MI?

Gingers Mom said...

I understand aboutthe thought of moving taking it's toll. God is with you, you know that. THere is always a purpose for what we experience. Hang in there. I am praying for you today.
Who knows what adventure is on the horizon?