Tips for Tennessee Drivers...

In my long career as a license-bearing driver, I have never had an accident or a ticket. (The closest I've come was a night several years ago when a new & powerful allergy medicine caused me to fall asleep at the wheel- I ended up driving in a ditch, nobody was hurt and I was able to wake up and steer out of it with barely a mark to my vehicle- Thank God.)
I've been driving in TN for 7 yrs now and here are some tongue-in-cheek observations and advice I have to offer to the drivers here in the Smoky Mountain State:

1.) Turn signals are best used well BEFORE you make your turn.
2.) Regardless of popular superstitions, you will not gain any good luck by driving with one tire on the yellow line.
3.) Turning your lights on at dusk or in a thick fog is a healthy thing- really!
4.) Before stopping to examine or scoop up roadkill deer, turkey or possum, get off the road and onto the shoulder.
5.) Be considerate. If you want to inch along while checking out the treasures of Bubba & Sissy-lou's yard sale- why not just pull in their driveway and let those of us who have somewhere to go keep driving?
6.) It is NOT illegal to drive the speed limit on Sundays.
7.) By the many puffs of blue & black smoke I have to breathe, I know that many of you pass TN emissions tests because a relative works at the testing center and lets you slide by year after year...
8.) Pick up your trash, don't make the convicts in orange vests do it- their lives are hard enough. Better yet, keep a little trash bag or small can in your car and empty in a convenient garbage bin next time you fill your tank. It's really not hard to do!
9.) Many a forest fire has been started by careless people flicking cigarette butts out the window. Why not use an ashtray instead?????? I really don't have the time to call the fire department and sit by the side of the road monitoring brush fires until they get there.
10.) Last time I checked, passing on the left is still legal in this state. Flipping me off for going the speed limit is not necessary.
11.) You REALLY WON'T get any points for swerving to hit a squirrel, a cat or a dog. (That's just a silly game someone made up)
12.) Speedbumps are supposed to mean you slow down, not speed up and go over them with a YEE-HAW just to test out your suspension!
13.) Recent scientific studies prove that slowing down to a crawl does not help you tune your radio station better, nor does it increase cell phone reception.
14.) On ramps are meant for MERGING with traffic, not stopping until the coast is clear!
15.) When giving directions, use actual street/town names and building numbers as landmarks, not big shiny rocks, or crooked Maple trees. For some reason, it's just easier to navigate that way.

Hope this is helpful, Tennesseans. Remember, when we all drive with courtesy, life is better. :o)